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THE SECOND WIVES ARE NOT SECOND CLASS CITIZENS
BY: AKANDE AYINDE MUTIU A.K.A (ABU HASSAN)
I intentionally say that “Second wives are not Second class citizens”
Most of the first wives look down on Second wives while some will even refer to them as helper, house girl or a servant who has come into the family to work for the first wife and her children.
This is totally wrong from the Islamic point of view. All wives have equal rights either first, Second, third or fourth wife.
Though,it is good for the second, third or fourth wife to respect the senior wife but not to the extent of taking them as small god.
However, Allah makes us understand in Suratu-l-Hujurat Q49:13 that we are all equal in His sight. Allah says “O mankind! We have created you from a male and female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another.
Verily,the most honourable of you with Allah is that who fears Him. Verily, Allah is All-knowing and All-Aware.
There are some families where the husband, the first wife and her children form a group while the second wife , her children are another group.
This type of setting should not be found in a Muslim home.The Islamic Polygyny calls for love, affection, co-operation and fear of Allah.
It is not a crime or sin to be 2nd,3rd or 4th wife.As a Muslim, we must believe in destiny. If it has been destined that you will be 2nd,3rd or 4th wife, there is nothing you can do.We should not challenge Allah’s authority.
Moreover, there are some men who abandon the first wife and turn her to a rag after marrying another wife. He will complain of almost everything the first wife does. This is totally wrong and such a man will be raised up paralyzed on the day of judgment according to the Hadith of Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W).
A man that marries a young girl as 2nd,3rd or 4th wife must come down to her level and allow her enjoy the sweetness of Marriage in terms of love, affection, sex, care, playing with her and spend money on her.
Aishat bint Abubabkr and Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) Is a significant case study. Go and read more on it.
Our ummus should take the issue of polygyny with faith and fear of Allah.
If we close the door of Polygyny, what will happen to the divorced women, widows and single ladies late for marriage?
Can you imagine a sister changing the word of Allah “Mathina to Bosina” Bosina means come into the hell-fire.
May Allah purify our intentions and bless our families 🙏 aamin.
Jazakumullah khoiran Fi Dunya Wal Akhirah.
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