Teach your teenage children that:
●Fornication is not a norm. Even if it has become so common, it is a great sin to God and a disservice to your body.
●Celibacy is not a sign of weakness or even sexual malfunction. It is a sign of purity – something to be proud of that you have not been desecrated by the unworthy and filthy.
●That Virginity should not be just about the sexual organs only. The eyes, hands, legs and mind should be virgins too. If these parts get corrupted with immorality, soon the genitals will confirm the corruption.
●Females are not mere objects of sexual gratification. There is more to a woman than her breast and buttocks.
●Not having a girlfriend does not make you less of a man. It makes you a man with a lot of control. It makes you a rare kind of a man in a world pervaded by immorality. It makes you a superman.
●Sex is not one sure way to prove depth of love. If he truly loves you, he will marry you. If he is a real man why does he want the sex but not the responsibility of keeping you?
●Sex is not the solution to your Dysmenorrhea (Menstrual cramps), it is one of those deceits of boys who want to get into your pants!
●Blue balls (pain in the testicles when you get turned on without an eventual climax) does not harm you. It is more common in people who expose themselves to arousing situations.
● Sperm accumulation has no medical side effect. Your body is equipped to deal with that till you are ready to put them to good use.
●Masturbation is not a safe way to understand your sexuality. You will only end up teaching yourself how to please yourself not how someone else should please you. You get addicted to it so much that no one can please you as good as you. It becomes a psychological problem, and it is a sin.
●Lesbianism is not ‘safe’ because it does not lead to pregnancy. It is filthy and a disgusting sin before Allaah. In Islam, the punishment for being Gay and Lesbian is greater than the punishment for fornication. As senseless as animals are, they do not get to such level of mental depravity to be gays, why humans? (Please talk to your girls especially about Lesbianism. It is becoming very comon, starting as early as in primary schools. There are very ugly cases we have handled that are unbelievable!).
I passed through teenagehood and know how trying it can be. I am also aware it is one of those periods that are very difficult for parents to handle their children. For a start, building effective communication link before the child enters teenagehood might help. Let your kids see you as a friend they can trust.
Mothers should have long broached the topic of menarche (onset of menstruation) with their daughters before she sees the first blood spots. That way she won’t be alarmed by it, and would rather inform you than run off to her friends who would tell her sex is one way to relieve the cramps!
Fathers should ‘hint’ their sons that at some stage in life they would begin to feel attracted to women. They may feel changes in their body at such periods but it is normal. Teach them how to handle such periods!
Ask your kids if they have a ‘crush’ on anybody. Laugh about it and tease them. Tell them it is normal to be attracted to things/people. But it is not everything we are attracted to that we can have. Teach them self control, how to be masters of their thoughts rather than slaves.
If you don’t teach your children to trust you, they will trust the wrong people who will teach them all the wrong things!
May Allaah grant us pious offsprings.